Monday, November 10, 2008
Finding joy in my creation
On Saturday i worked at the elections from 7:45am til 9:30pm thus killing any chances of catching up on my nanowrimo wordcount over the weekend. And having already worked out that i needed to have 15000 words by the 9th of november to stay on track, I was a bit stressed. I sat down last night to try and catch up and my mind went blank. The stress of what i was attempting to achieve hit me, along with frustration at the lack of forthcoming inspiration, and i resorted to menial tasks such as playing solitaire on my laptop, wandering around the house looking for things to do and eating even though i wasn't actually hungry. Then i wrote a brief discourse at the end of my novel on how much i hated my story and how horrible and boring it was, how i never want anybody else but me to read it and what on earth was i thinking and so on and so forth. Finally i went hunting for one of my old journals, from when i was overseas. Flicking open to a random page was a brief comment, Today we were talking to (i forget) and he told us a story. They were driving along the road when (?) yelled at him to stop the car. He jumped out and ran around a corner hand over mouth and threw up on the ground. Unfortunately, he didn't know it at the time but he was actually standing outside a huge restaurant with glass windows... and there was a family just inside staring back at him. As i read i laughed, as i laughed i relaxed and as i relaxed memories formed into ideas and ideas became words and before i knew it i was happy and the wordcount grew, which of course made me happier... and in the flow. I still haven't caught up yet, but when i woke up this morning i had a sense of hope. Creating demands a lot of a person, passion and enthusiasm and mostly love for what one is doing. To quote Orson Scott Card my favourite scifi/historical fiction writer, "A creator is one who is a part of what he creates." Just like the supreme Creator, who called us all into existence as well as this world, all creation denotes that He is there and that he wants us to be happy.