Ups and Downs

Last week started off awesome. It was temple week, so I spent a lot of time in that wonderful building, feeling peaceful and serene and happy, thinking about a lot of different things, and feeling really good in general. I got to do some family work, which made it even better, and I started thinking about getting back into family history again which I haven't touched for a couple of years now. Talking to one of my friends mothers - she has done about 33,000 family names, one of her lines even extends back to Adam and Eve, and she is now hitting brick walls and has started running out of names to do. She is the first person I have ever known with such a problem. I certainly don't have that problem.

Then friday when I got out of the temple and went home, I decided to sit down and have a "Big Bang Theory" marathon. I had bought DVD's of Season 1-3 and had only watched part of the first season. My mood rapidly went downhill - which I couldn't figure out because the DVDs were hilarious and I really liked them. But by the evening I was feeling depressed and horrible, and ended up at the supermarket buying icecream, chocolate, potato chips and dip, none of which improved my mood any despite eating almost everything I'd just bought.

Saturday I woke up and decided to attempt to pull myself out of whatever funk I had somehow sunk into (still not being able to figure out why). I went to see some family, which helped, seeing my nephews helped as well, they always cheer me up. So much cuteness in two little people. I had work that afternoon, then a work do which was a Fawlty Towers dinner show evening. It was hilarious. The guy playing Manuel had his work cut out for him, a fine balance between acting his part and pissing people off, stealing their chairs, sitting on them and ending the night doing a strip tease (brave man). We told him our boss was retiring, so he spent the rest of the night yelling about our boss being retarded, and even gave him a baby dummy.

Yesterday I felt like I had gone from up to down to neutral. Like I wasn't entirely joyful, but I wasn't as low as I was on Friday. I had work in the afternoon, it was busy and therefore went by fast. And today, despite the fog, cancelled flights, dealing with disrupted passengers, delays and feeling somewhat stressed, I did have some lovely moments too, and I felt really peaceful and happy despite the chaos.

So what do I take from all this? Well after reading The Christmas Box collection by Richard Paul Evans, I think what I took from it is that I need to leave the past in the past. Stop looking backwards, wondering how things might have gone differently, stop pining over people I'm never going to end up with and just start making plans for my future and improve my attitude towards it. Stop expecting the worst and start expecting the best and moving towards it.