Why I write

Its been a while since i last posted, and I miss my blog. I usually write for therapeutic reasons, it helps my thinking to be able to see things on paper/in cyberspace. I notice different things than what I noticed in my own mind. It also helps to have a third opinion on my own views, I always learn alot more that way than I would have otherwise.

This week has been ok, slightly chaotic but emotionally flat. I usually write when I'm really happy or really upset about something, but this week has been quite blah. Never mind the Zeal staff strike right outside the airport on thursday, the gunman holding little Napier under siege or my bosses refusal to give me the leave that I asked for, none of it seemed to touch my emotions. It was like there was a wall around me, blocking it all out and holding everything at arms length. I don't quite know why, possibly i'm in denial about something. I was sick last week so my view of things became quite distorted, and in such a hazy mental fog I found myself unable to do all or even half of the things I had planned to do. Ordinary mundane things like, my washing, or cleaning up my room, or vacuuming for that matter.

Back to the topic. Why I write. It feels better when I write. Like i've accomplished something small and simple in my own little world, even if it is only something of value to myself. Writing helps me understand the things around me better, and touches on a small creative chord within myself that brings me joy. When I'm down, it brings me up to almost neutral, and when im neutral, writing lifts me up, not quite to elation, but at least something very near to it.